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Fantasize about having a cock? Or being double penetrated? Wish you had a way to fill your holes on your own? Always want to try pegging or strap-on sex?
Sexplorers, it’s time to add a dildo to your drawer.
We believe pleasure is a fundamental aspect of a safe and healthy sex life. That’s why we rely on experienced writers, educators, and other experts to share their suggestions on everything from the technique you use to the sex toy you buy.
我们只推荐我们真正喜欢的东西，因此，如果您看到与特定产品或品牌的商店链接，请知道它已经对其进行了彻底的研究 - 如果您知道我们的意思。Wink.
Glad you asked.
“A dildo is a phallic-shaped toy intended for insertion,” says Lisa Finn, a sex educator at online sex toy boutiqueBabeland.
非常重要的是：阳具≠看起来完全像生物阴茎。
A dildo does *not* need to have veins, a pronounced head, or balls. There are endless options that aren’t shaped to look like a biological penis.
There’s a misconception that dildos are only used bycisgenderlesbians. That isn’t the case at all.
“Dildos can be worn, received, and enjoyed by folks of所有性别and sexual orientations,” says Sarah Sloane, a sex educator who’s been coaching sex toy classes at良好的振动andPleasure Chestsince 2001.
“Using a certain sex toy or enjoying certain sex acts doesn’t change yoursexual orientationor gender identity.”
There are probably a billion different types of dildos on the market and just as many reasons someone might want to buy and use one.
To name a few:
- to affirm gender identity or sexuality, or experience gender euphoria
- to make penetration possible when it otherwise wouldn’t be due to partner genitalia,erectile dysfunction, relationship status, or partner availability
- to explore double penetration, alone or with a partner
- 延长现有阴茎的大小
Think aboutexactlywhat you want to use your dildo for and what features you want it to have before handing over your credit card.
If you want to use it anally, make sure it has a base
Ready to read the most important sentence in this whole piece?
If you’re going to put it in your butt, itneeds to have a basethat’s wider than the thickest part of the dildo.
“The rectum doesn’t have a point of no return the way the vagina does, so you need something to keep it anchored outside the body,” explains Sloane.
Figure out if you want it to be realistic
“For some people, a penis is an incredibly erotic symbol,” says Sloane. “And there are others for whom wearing or being penetrated by a realistic dildo is incredibly affirming for their gender identity or sexual orientation.”
But, she says, “Many people don’t want to be penetrated by something that looks like a penis or wear something that looks like a penis.”
Pleasure-based, queer-inclusive sex educator and sex-positivity advocateLateef Taylor补充说，如果您决定想要不同的东西，那么a lot有趣的选择考虑。
Did you know that there are even dildos shaped likeswords,tentacles, orsasquatches?
Worth mentioning: Most realistic dildos have a pronounced head.
This can increase the chances of hittingthe G-spotduring vaginal sex, but you might want to consider something smaller if you plan to use it for beginner anal play.
Think about whether you enjoy vibration
There are two types of vibrating dildos:
- dildos like theLux Touch Sensitive Vibrating Dildo或者有趣的工厂股份, which have a built-in motor in the shaft
- dildos like theRiley Vibrating Silicone Dildo, which have an opening on the base that can fit a bullet vibrator
If you buy a non-vibrating dildo and end up wishing it did vibrate, you can always add a vibrating cock ring like theLelo Tor 2orWe Vibe Pivot, which will send vibration down the shaft to both the wearer and receiver.
Start small
Especially if you’re planning to use it anally.
“Butts are nature’s magnifying glass,” says Sloane. “No matter how small it looks online, in your hand, or on the store shelf, it’s going to feel bigger.”
If you’re new to anal penetration, she recommends starting with something that’s no more than 1-inch around at its thickest insertable point. (Thetantus丝绸小假阳具is a great option).
The same goes for folks who are new to vaginal penetration.
否则，如果您已经知道自己喜欢腰带，则可以开始更广泛。
The best dildo for pegging isn’t the same dildo as the best dildo for double penetration which isn’t the best dildo for packing which isn’t the best dildo for oral sex which isn’t — you get the idea.
For prostate stimulation
Finn建议选择带有大曲线和球形尖端的假阳具Pegasus Curved Realistic Harness Set.
For A-spot or cervical stimulation
Sloane suggests opting for a long, thin dildo like thenJoy Pure Wand.
For G-spot stimulation
一个简短的围墙假阳具，像Buck Vixskin假阳具或者Temptasia Elvira Dildois best.
For double penetration
You could use two separate dildos and put one in each hole, you could connect two dildos with adouble-sided suction cup, or you could get a U-shaped double-ended dildo like theRuse Double假阳具.
玩andpack with
AKA to wear in a sexual or non-sexual setting to give the appearance of a penis or of a larger penis.
You want a dildo made out of dual-density silicone such as theNew York Sex Toy Collective Mason或者Emisil Pack and Play Penis, says Taylor.
To give or receive a blow job
Sloane recommendsThe BJ Dildo.
“It features a small opening at the tip and one at the base, which creates a seal against the wearer’s body so when the giver sucks, a sucking sensation can be felt by the wearer,” explains Sloane.
If you’re a size royal
Finn suggests theAvant Pride P9 Bear Dildo, which is 1.75 inches wide, or theCarter, which is 2 inches wide.
如果佩戴者或接收器更大
Sloane notes that you may want to go longer than you think you need.
斯隆说：“如果佩戴者有腹部，并且接收器有倾斜度，那么几英寸最终不会被插入。”
To extend the size of your current phallus
芬恩建议（公认的命名不佳）OptiMale PPA Extender.
“This also changes the sensation a penis-owner will feel during sex,” explains Finn. “It’s like adding a textured masturbation sleeve to penetrative sex.”
多孔是“即使被洗涤，也可以捕获细菌可以捕获细菌”的另一个词。
由于假阳具可能会进入充满细菌的缝隙，因此您想要一些可以完全获得100％清洁的东西。
Otherwise, each use can introduce bacteria that can lead to things like a sore throat,urinary tract infection(UTI), oryeast infection. Pass.
Nonporous materials include:
- medical-grade silicone
- ABS plastic
- stainless steel
- glass
硅胶通常是首次假阳具所有者/佩戴者/用户的最佳建议。
But Sloane says that stainless steel and glass are great options for folks who:
- find penetration painful
- want to explore temperature play
- 重享受愉悦的产品
不锈钢和玻璃之间的主要区别？
“Steel is heavier,” says Sloane. “You’relesslikely to find a harnessable stainless steel dildo.”
Cheers to sexcessories!
Yes, you真的need lube
“Lube makes almost every sexual activity better because it reduces friction,” says Sloane.
Although the vagina can self-lubricate, the anus can’t, so lube isespeciallyimportant duringanal play.
Lube can also enhance dildo hand jobs and blow jobs by cutting back on “stickiness” and creating a sexy wet look.
Save your toy: With silicone-based toys, use a water-based lube like蛋糕玩具欢乐orSliquid Sassy.
Add a harness for hands-free play
Dildos don’t *need* a harness to be enjoyed.
They can be manually manipulated during solo or partnered sex. Or held in place during oral/vaginal/anal sex.
However, using a dildo with a harness offers you ahand-free experience.
When buying a harness with/for your dildo, keep in mind that dildos aren’t compatible with all harnesses.
Every harness has something called an O-ring, which holds the dildo in place. If the O ring is bigger than the dildo, the dildo will slip out. If it’s too small, it simply won’t attach to the harness at all.
Some harnesses, like theTerra Firm D Ring Harness, come with interchangeable O-rings.
Others, like theSquareParts JoqueorRodeoh Classic Brief Harness, do not.
So before you buy a harness, you want to check:
- Is this harnesscompatiblewith this dildo?
- If not, can the O-ring be replaced with an O-ring of a different size?
Don’t want to think about any of this? Buy a strap-on (which is what a dildo + harness combo set is called) instead:
Consider condoms
Hey, they offer easy clean-upandSTI prevention (more on that below). So why wouldn’t youadd them? Just remember that a smaller dildo is gonna need asmaller condom.
The unofficial dildo motto: Patience, practice, and communication.
Get to know your toy… intimately
计划将安全带绑在合作比赛中？
Sloane recommends walking/dancing/prancing around the house with it to get used to the way it moves, its heft, and how it responds to your body.
“Masturbating while strapped on can be hot, in addition to helping you learn how the toy reacts to your thrusts, rocks, and movement,” says Sloane.
Communicate, communicate, and communicate
“A dildo doesn’t have nerve endings,” says Finn. Meaning, the wearer won’t be able to feel exactly how deep they are (or even when/if they slip out).
Your move = check in constantly! You might say:
- “我要让你把我带入我想要的深处。当你在那里，告诉我。”
- “Does this rhythm feel good? Do you want me deeper or more shallow?”
- “您更喜欢更快还是较慢的推力？”
- “How does this feel for you?”
- “你想使用你的振动器/masturbation sleeve on yourself?”
Play around with position
The position that works best will depend on whether you’re wearing the dildo and what sex acts you’re planning to use it for.
For partnered play, positions that allow the receiving partner to direct the depth and rhythm are best. Think: rider on top, reverse rider, ordoggy style.
“It may take some trial and error to find a configuration that works best for you,” says Sloane. If you don’t get it ~just right~ the first time, don’t fret!
Pegging and strap-on sex (of all kinds) are considered a low-risk activity, but that doesn’t mean sexually transmitted infections are impossible.
如果你的伴侣有性病,你使用/我的假阳具n them, and then use the dildo on/in yourself without washing it first, STI transmission can occur.
Why? Potential infection.
Finn说：“即使您是唯一打算使用这种假阳具的人，也要在使用之间将其清洗，以便从将细菌引入您的身体中，这些细菌可能引起细菌感染，酵母菌感染，[或] utis。”
硅胶，玻璃或不锈钢假阳具可以用温水和无香皂完全清洗。
另外，请干！（再见，霉菌）。
With so many damn typesof并用途fordildos, odds are a dildo would be a welcome addition to your sex toy collection.
加布里埃尔·卡塞尔（Gabrielle Kassel）是纽约的性爱和健康作家和CrossFit 1级教练。她已经成为一个早起的人，经过200多个振动器的测试，并用木炭吃饭，喝醉并刷了 - 这都是新闻业的名义。在业余时间，她可以找到阅读自助书籍和浪漫小说，板凳压制或钢管舞。跟着她Instagram.