My psoriasis started off as a small spot on the top of my left arm when I was diagnosed at age 10. At that moment, I had no thoughts about how different my life would become. I was young and optimistic. I’d never heard of psoriasis and the effects it could have on someone’s body before.
But it wasn’t long until all of that changed. That tiny spot grew to cover the majority of my body, and while it took over my skin, it also took over much of my life.
当我年轻的时候，我很难适应，并努力寻找我在世界上的位置。我绝对喜欢的一件事是足球。当我们参加州冠军并感到自由时，我将永远不会忘记参加女子足球队，就像我在世界之巅一样。我生动地记得四处奔波并在足球场上尖叫，以完全表达自己并振作起来。我有我崇拜的队友，即使我不是最好的球员，我还是非常喜欢成为团队的一员。
When I was diagnosed with psoriasis, all of that changed. The thing I once loved became an activity riddled with anxiety and discomfort. I went from being carefree in my short sleeves and shorts, to wearing long sleeves and leggings underneath my clothes as I ran around in the hot summer sun, just so people wouldn’t be freaked out by the way I looked. It was brutal and heartbreaking.
After that experience, I spent a lot of time focusing on everything I couldn’t do because I had psoriasis. I felt sorry for myself and was furious with people who seemed to be able to do it all. Instead of finding ways to enjoy life despite my condition, I spent a lot of time isolating myself.
这些是我认为我做不到因为se I had psoriasis.
我记得我第一次远足。我对自己经历并真正喜欢它的事实感到敬畏。我的牛皮癣不仅使运动具有挑战性，而且在19岁那年也被诊断出患有银屑病关节炎。银屑病关节炎使我不再想再移动身体，因为这是如此痛苦。每当有人要求我做一些涉及移动身体的事情时，我都会以“绝对不这样做”做出回应。远足对我来说是一项史诗般的成就。我走了很慢，但是我做到了！
是的，迄今为止我很害怕。我想确定没有人愿意和我约会，因为我的身体被牛皮癣覆盖。我对此非常不对。大多数人根本不在乎。
I also found that true intimacy was challenging for everyone — not just for me. I was afraid that people would reject me because of my psoriasis, when little did I know, the person I was dating was also afraid I’d reject something completely unique to them.
我知道这似乎很戏剧性，但是对我来说，这是非常真实的。我生命中大约有六年的牛皮癣是如此令人衰弱，以至于我几乎无法移动身体。我不知道当时我将如何担任工作甚至找到工作。最终，我创建了自己的公司，因此我从来没有让自己的健康决定我是否可以工作。
当我的牛皮癣很严重时，我尽了一切所能将其隐藏起来。最后，我达到了学习如何真正拥有自己所处的皮肤并拥抱鳞片和斑点的点。我的皮肤是完美的，所以我开始向世界展示它。
Don’t get me wrong, I was completely terrified, but it ended up being incredibly liberating. I was insanely proud of myself for letting go of perfection and being so vulnerable.
Although it was uncomfortable at first, and I certainly had a ton of resistance to it, I was deeply committed to a happier experience for myself.
Every time I’d have the opportunity to try an activity or go to an event, my first reaction was to say “no” or “I can’t do that because I’m sick.” The first step to changing my negative attitude was to acknowledge when I said those things and explore if it was even true. Surprisingly, itwasn’ta lot of the time. I’d avoided loads of opportunities and adventures because I’d always assumed I couldn’t do most things.
I began to discover just how incredible life could be if I started to say “yes” more and if I started to trust that my body was stronger than I was giving it credit for.
Can you relate to this? Do you find yourself saying that you can’t do things because of your condition? If you take a moment to think about it, you might realize that you’re more capable than you thought. Give it a try. The next time you want to automatically say “no,” let yourself choose “yes” and see what happens.
Nitika Chopra是一位美丽和生活方式专家，致力于传播自我保健的力量和自我爱的信息。她也是牛皮癣，也是“自然美丽”脱口秀节目的主持人。与她联系网站,Twitter, orInstagram.