你有一个患有抑郁症的朋友吗？你不是一个人。
According to the most recent estimates from the National Institute of Mental Health, just over
Not everyone experiences沮丧in the same way, andsymptoms能够vary.
If your friend is experiencing depression, they may:
- seem more sad or tearful than usual
- appear more pessimistic than usual or hopeless about the future
- talk about feeling guilty, empty, or worthless more often than usual
- seem less interested in spending time together or communicate less frequently than they normally would
- 容易发生或似乎异常烦躁
- 比平常能量少，慢慢移动，或似乎一般无精打采
- 与通常或忽视基本卫生的外观较少，例如淋浴和刷牙
- have trouble sleeping or sleep much more than usual
- 关心他们通常的活动和兴趣
- experience forgetfulness more often or have trouble concentrating or deciding on things
- eat more or less than usual
- talk about death or suicide
These 10 tips can help you be a source of support for a friend with depression.
1. Start a conversation
让你的朋友知道你在那里。您可以通过分享您的疑虑并询问特定问题来开始对话。
For example, you might say:
- “It seems like you’ve been having a hard time lately. What’s on your mind?”
- “The last few times we hung out, you seemed a little down. Is there anything going on you that you’d like to talk about?”
- “You mentioned going through some hard times recently — how are you feeling about everything?”
Keep in mind that your friend may want to talk about what they feel, but they might not want advice.
Engage with your friend by using active listening techniques:
- Ask questions to get more information instead of assuming you understand what they mean.
- Validate their feelings. You might say, “That sounds really difficult. I’m sorry to hear that.”
- Show empathy and interest with your body language.
你r friend may not feel like talking the first time you ask, so it can help to continue telling them you care.
Keep asking open questions (without being pushy) and expressing your concern. Try to have conversations in person whenever possible. If you live in different areas, try video chatting.
2.帮助他们找到支持
你r friend may not be aware they’re dealing with depression, or they may be unsure how to reach out forsupport。
即使他们知道治疗可以提供帮助，也可以令人生畏搜索治疗师并预约。
如果您的朋友似乎对咨询有兴趣，请帮助他们审查潜在的治疗师。您可以帮助您的朋友列表事项，以便在第一届会议中提出他们想要提及的潜在治疗师和事物。
Encouraging them and supporting them to make that first appointment can be so helpful if they’re having a hard time with it.
3.在继续治疗中支持它们
On a bad day, your friend might not feel like leaving the house. Depression can zap energy and increase the desire to self-isolate.
If they say something like, “I think I’m going to cancel my therapy appointment,” encourage them to stick with it.
你might say, “Last week you said your session was really productive and you felt a lot better afterward. What if today’s session helps, too?”
The same goes for药物。If your friend wants to stop taking medication because of unpleasantside effects, be supportive, but encourage them to talk with their psychiatrist about switching to a different antidepressant or stopping their medication entirely.
Abruptly stopping antidepressants without the supervision of a healthcare professional may haveserious consequences。Typically, reaching out to a healthcare professional before stopping medication use can prevent health complications.
4. Take care of yourself
When you care about someone who’s living with depression, it’s tempting to drop everything to be by their side and support them. It’s not wrong to want to help a friend, but it’s also important to take care of your own needs.
If you put all your energy into supporting your friend, you’ll have very little left for yourself. And if you’re feeling burned out or frustrated, you won’t be much help to your friend.
Set boundaries
设定边界能够help. For example, you might let your friend know you’re available to talk after you get home from work, but not before then.
If you’re concerned about them feeling like they can’t reach you, offer to help them come up with a contingency plan if they need you during your work day. This might involve finding ahotlinethey can call or coming up with a code word they can text you if they’re in a crisis.
你might offer to stop by every other day or bring a meal twice a week, instead of trying to help every day. Involving other friends can help create a bigger support network.
Practice self-care
Spending a lot of time with a loved one who has depression can take an emotional toll. Know your limits around difficult emotions, and make sure you take time torecharge。
If you need to let your friend know you won’t be available for a while, you might say something like, “I can’t talk until X time. Can I check in with you then?”
5. Learn about depression on your own
想象一下，必须教育你生命中的每个人关于你正在经历的精神或身体健康状况 - 一遍又一遍地解释它。听起来很筋疲力尽，对吧？
你能够talk with your friend about their specific symptoms or how they’re feeling, but avoid asking them to tell you about depression in general terms.
Read up on the symptoms, causes, diagnostic criteria, and treatments on your own.
While people experience depression differently, being familiar with the general symptoms and terminology can help you have more in-depth conversations with your friend.
6.提供日常任务的提议
患有抑郁症，日常任务可能会感到压倒性。像洗衣，杂货店购物或支付账单这样的东西可以开始堆积，使得难以知道在哪里开始。
你的朋友可能会欣赏别人提供的帮助,但they also might not be able to clearly say what they need help with.
So, instead of saying “Let me know if there’s anything I can do,” consider saying, “What do you most need help with today?”
If you notice their refrigerator is empty, say “Can I take you grocery shopping, or pick up what you need if you write me a list?” or “Let’s go get some groceries and cook dinner together.”
If your friend is behind on dishes, laundry, or other household chores, offer to come over, put some music on, and tackle a specific task together. Simply having company can make the work seem less daunting.
7. Extend loose invitations
People living with depression may have a hard time reaching out to friends and making or keeping plans. But canceling plans can contribute to guilt.
A pattern of canceled plans may lead to fewer invitations, which can increase isolation. These feelings can worsen depression.
你能够help reassure your friend by continuing to extend invitations to activities, even if you know they’re unlikely to accept. Tell them you understand they may not keep plans when they’re in a rough patch and that there’s no pressure to hang out until they’re ready.
Just remind them you’re happy to see them whenever they feel like it.
8.要耐心
抑郁症通常随治疗而改善，但它可能是一种缓慢的过程，涉及一些试验和错误。他们可能不得不尝试一些不同的咨询方法或药物，然后找到一个有助于他们的症状。
Even successful treatment doesn’t always mean depression goes away entirely. Your friend may continue to have symptoms from time to time.
In the meantime, they’ll probably have some good days and some bad days. Avoid assuming a good day means they’re “cured,” and try not to get frustrated if a string of bad days makes it seem like your friend will never improve.
Depression doesn’t have a clear recovery timeline. Expecting your friend to return to their usual self after a few weeks in therapy won’t help either of you.
9. Stay in touch
让你的朋友知道你仍然关心阿布t them as they continue to work through depression can help.
Even if you aren’t able to spend a lot of time with them on a regular basis, check in regularly with a text, phone call, or quick visit. Even sending a quick text saying “I’ve been thinking of you and I care about you” can help.
生活在抑郁症的人可能会撤回并避免伸出援手，所以你可能会发现自己正在做更多的工作来维持友谊。但是，即使他们目前不能向你表达这一点，仍然是一个积极的，支持的存在可能会对他们产生所有影响。
10. Know the different forms depression can take
Depression often involves sadness or a low mood, but it also has other, less well-known symptoms.
For example, many people don’t realize depression can involve:
- angerand irritability
- 困惑，记忆困难，或难以关注
- excessive fatigue or sleep concerns
- physical symptoms如胃病，频繁的头痛，或背部和其他肌肉疼痛
你r friend may often seem to be in a bad mood, or feel exhausted a lot of the time. Try to keep in mind that what they’re feeling is still part of depression, even if it doesn’t fit into the stereotypical versions of depression.
Even if you don’t know how to help them feel better, simply saying “I’m sorry you’re feeling this way. I’m here to help if there’s anything I can do” may help.
1. Taking things personally
你r friend’s depression isn’t your fault, just as it’s not their fault.
Try not to let it get to you if they seem to lash out at you in anger or frustration, keep canceling plans (or forget to follow up), or don’t want to do much of anything.
你might, at some point, need a break from your friend. It’s OK to take space for yourself if you feel emotionally drained, but it’s also important to avoid blaming your friend or saying things that might contribute to their negative feelings.
Instead, consider talking with a therapist or other supportive person about how you feel.
2. Trying to fix them
Depression is a serious mental health condition that requires professional treatment.
It can be hard to understand exactly what depression feels like if you’ve never experienced it. But it isn’t something that can be cured with a few well-intentioned phrases like, “You should be grateful for the good things in your life” or “Just stop thinking about sad things.”
If you wouldn’t say something to someone living with a physical condition, like diabetes or cancer, you probably shouldn’t say it to your friend with depression.
你能够encourage positivity (though your friend may not respond) by reminding them of things you like about them — especially when it seems like they only have negative things to say.
Positive support can let your friend know they do really matter to you.
3. Giving advice
Though certain lifestyle changes often help improve symptoms of depression, it can be hard to make these changes in the midst of a depressive episode.
你might want to help by offering advice, like getting more exercise or eating a balanced diet. But even if it’s good advice, your friend may not want to hear it at the moment.
There may come a time when your friend wants to find out what食物may help with depression or howexercise能够relieve symptoms. Until then, though, it may be best to stick to empathic listening and avoid offering advice until asked.
通过邀请他们在散步或一起烹饪营养餐来鼓励积极的变革。
4. Minimizing or comparing their experience
If your friend talks about their depression, you might want to say things like, “I understand,” or “We’ve all been there.” But if you’ve never dealt with depression yourself, this can minimize their feelings.
抑郁症不仅仅是感到悲伤或低。悲伤通常会相当快地通过，而抑郁症可以徘徊，影响情绪，关系，工作，学校以及几个月甚至几年的生活的所有其他方面。
Comparing what they’re going through to someone else’s troubles or saying things like, “But things could be so much worse,” generally doesn’t help.
你r friend’s pain is what’s real to them right now — and validating that pain is what may help them most.
说出来，“我无法想象处理的艰难。我知道我不能让你感觉更好，但只记得你并不孤单。“
5. Taking a stance on medication
Medication can be very helpful for depression, but it doesn’t work well for everyone.
Some people dislike its side effects and prefer to treat depression with治疗要么natural remedies。即使您认为您的朋友应该服用抗抑郁药，请记住选择服用药物是个人决定。
Likewise, if you personally don’t believe in medication, avoid the subject when talking with them. For some people, medication is key in getting them to a place where they can fully engage in therapy and start taking steps toward recovery.
在一天结束时，是否有抑郁症服用药物的某人是一个非常个人的决定，通常是最好的留给他们和他们的医疗保健专业人士。
Depression can increase a person’s risk ofsuicide要么self-injury, so it’s helpful to know how to recognize the signs.
Some signs that might indicate your friend is having serious suicidal thoughts include:
- frequent mood or personality changes
- talking about death or dying
- purchasing a weapon
- increased substance use
- risky or dangerous behavior
- getting rid of belongings or giving away treasured possessions
- talking about feeling trapped or wanting a way out
- pushing people away or saying they want to be left alone
- saying goodbye with more feeling than usual
如果您认为您的朋友正在考虑自杀，请敦促他们在与他们同行时调用他们的治疗师或者如果您可以拨打他们的朋友，请询问您的朋友。
危机支持他们也可以发短信给“家”Crisis Text Lineat 741741 or call theNational Suicide Prevention Lifeline在1-800-273-8255。
Not in the United States?The International Association for Suicide Prevention能够link you to hotlines and other resources in your country.
你能够also take your friend to an emergency room. If possible, stay with your friend until they no longer feel suicidal. Make sure they can’t access any weapons or drugs.
If you’re concerned about your friend, you might worry that mentioning it to them could encourage suicidal thoughts. But it’s generally helpful to talk about it.
Ask your friend if they’ve seriously considered suicide. They may want to talk with someone about it but are unsure of how to bring up the difficult topic.
如果他们还没有，鼓励他们与他们的治疗师交谈。如果他们认为他们可能对这些想法采取行动，请帮助他们创建安全计划。